Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Monday, November 10, 2008
Food Post 2: Goat Yogurt
You have to click on the clip above, if only to hear the music. It's from the 1968 television adaptation of Heidi (the infamous one that preempted that football game), and it's kind of the music I hear in my head every time I think of goats.
So when I showed up at the Farmers' Market, half-an-hour before it closed, and found out they were out of cow yogurt and only had goat yogurt left for sale, I said "I'll try that!"
Alpine hills, pretty red dresses, symphony orchestras, and happy children squirting goat milk directly into their mouths. Sounded delicious.
Not so much.
Do you know what goat yogurt tastes like?
GOAT.
For all goat yogurt is supposed to be easier to digest than cow yogurt, I tried it twice and both times it made me feel nauseated. The texture felt hairy. Putting fruit in it didn't help either.
I did, however, quickly find a home for my goat yogurt: I sent around an email at work asking if anyone would like a fresh pint and instantly got a response. So someone else gets a delicious present, and I don't have to waste food.
Next time I'll get to the Farmers' Market a little earlier.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Mamma Mia: I Love You. Let's Sleep With Other People.
WARNING: The following contains mild-to-major spoilers for the film Mamma Mia... but it's not like the movie's a real cliffhanger or anything.
I saw Mamma Mia tonight, mostly because I like movies which feature singing, dancing, and Colin Firth.
The movie has plenty of all the above. There are very few moments when someone is neither singing nor dancing -- which, when one considers the spoken dialogue, is a very good thing. And Firth, true to form, jumps into a body of water to save the woman he loves. (Do you suppose that's written into his rider?)
If you've read any other reviews, you've figured out that Meryl Streep is made of awesome and Pierce Brosnan can't sing to save his life. I'd argue that Brosnan can't act, either, and that given the choice most sensible women would prefer Mr. Darcy to James Bond, so I don't know why the filmmakers picked Pierce as "the one Meryl Streep ends up with at the end of the movie." (Told you there would be spoilers.)
One particular review I read, while stuck at a metro stop during a thunderstorm, condemned the movie for its "freewheeling morality." (Would post the link, but this isn't the kind of newspaper that is published online.) While one would be hard-pressed to call any of the characters "immoral" (even the theoretical promiscuity leading up to the film's central conceit is ridiculously tame; Meryl Streep's character goes through a breakup and, over the period of a month, tries to find love with two other men), there was one segment of the storyline that troubled me a little.
It happens during the movie's First Fake Ending, with the young couple (which takes place before the Second Fake Ending where Pierce pledges his love to Meryl and then the Real Ending where Julie Walters seduces That Third Actor You've Never Heard Of and everybody pogos... and then there's the Post-Ending and the Post-Post Ending, but never mind).
So the young couple is standing there at the altar, and it's been obvious from the very beginning of the film that they are too young to get married OMG because that's what the dialogue has been telling us. ("How old are you?" asks Third Actor. "Twenty!" chirps too-young-to-be-getting-married Amanda Seyfried.) I'd argue that back-in-the-day plenty of people got married at their age, but the world has changed, and now all of the adult characters in the movie stand around and whisper to one another that this couple is too young to be getting married because neither of them have "seen the world" or "found themselves."
Anyway. So there they are at the altar, and little Amanda Seyfried suddenly says "OMG! We really are too young to get married!" And the twenty-year-old groom says "Oh noes! But I love you!" And Amanda says "But I love you too! So let's travel the world together!"
So here's the question. Why is it more important for them to travel the world unmarried rather than married? Why can't a newly-married couple travel the world?
The answer has to be "well, if they aren't married, then they can sleep with other people." That, and go through a really tragic, painful breakup on the Alps or something.
So that's what bothered me about the movie. (That, and Pierce Brosnan's singing.) There can be few things worse than going to your own wedding and hearing your potential spouse say "Um... I don't think I can do this... but if you'd like, I'll demote you back to boyfriend again, and you can re-prove yourself to me in a foreign country although my entire family seems to be wishing I'll find myself by messing around with a bunch of local boys... which is what my mom did, and that's how I ended up with three potential fathers, but look, we're singing and dancing now, so we're all happy!"
But then they started singing and dancing, so I was all happy.
I saw Mamma Mia tonight, mostly because I like movies which feature singing, dancing, and Colin Firth.
The movie has plenty of all the above. There are very few moments when someone is neither singing nor dancing -- which, when one considers the spoken dialogue, is a very good thing. And Firth, true to form, jumps into a body of water to save the woman he loves. (Do you suppose that's written into his rider?)
If you've read any other reviews, you've figured out that Meryl Streep is made of awesome and Pierce Brosnan can't sing to save his life. I'd argue that Brosnan can't act, either, and that given the choice most sensible women would prefer Mr. Darcy to James Bond, so I don't know why the filmmakers picked Pierce as "the one Meryl Streep ends up with at the end of the movie." (Told you there would be spoilers.)
One particular review I read, while stuck at a metro stop during a thunderstorm, condemned the movie for its "freewheeling morality." (Would post the link, but this isn't the kind of newspaper that is published online.) While one would be hard-pressed to call any of the characters "immoral" (even the theoretical promiscuity leading up to the film's central conceit is ridiculously tame; Meryl Streep's character goes through a breakup and, over the period of a month, tries to find love with two other men), there was one segment of the storyline that troubled me a little.
It happens during the movie's First Fake Ending, with the young couple (which takes place before the Second Fake Ending where Pierce pledges his love to Meryl and then the Real Ending where Julie Walters seduces That Third Actor You've Never Heard Of and everybody pogos... and then there's the Post-Ending and the Post-Post Ending, but never mind).
So the young couple is standing there at the altar, and it's been obvious from the very beginning of the film that they are too young to get married OMG because that's what the dialogue has been telling us. ("How old are you?" asks Third Actor. "Twenty!" chirps too-young-to-be-getting-married Amanda Seyfried.) I'd argue that back-in-the-day plenty of people got married at their age, but the world has changed, and now all of the adult characters in the movie stand around and whisper to one another that this couple is too young to be getting married because neither of them have "seen the world" or "found themselves."
Anyway. So there they are at the altar, and little Amanda Seyfried suddenly says "OMG! We really are too young to get married!" And the twenty-year-old groom says "Oh noes! But I love you!" And Amanda says "But I love you too! So let's travel the world together!"
So here's the question. Why is it more important for them to travel the world unmarried rather than married? Why can't a newly-married couple travel the world?
The answer has to be "well, if they aren't married, then they can sleep with other people." That, and go through a really tragic, painful breakup on the Alps or something.
So that's what bothered me about the movie. (That, and Pierce Brosnan's singing.) There can be few things worse than going to your own wedding and hearing your potential spouse say "Um... I don't think I can do this... but if you'd like, I'll demote you back to boyfriend again, and you can re-prove yourself to me in a foreign country although my entire family seems to be wishing I'll find myself by messing around with a bunch of local boys... which is what my mom did, and that's how I ended up with three potential fathers, but look, we're singing and dancing now, so we're all happy!"
But then they started singing and dancing, so I was all happy.
I Was A Dork In High School, Okay????
In "honor" of the completely unnecessary second X-Files movie, I'll share a little song parody I wrote back in high school.
It's meant to be a take on "Best of All Possible Worlds" from Candide, which you can hear here. (You should watch; it's got Kristin Chenoweth.)
Chris Carter is standing at the head of a classroom. His students are Mulder, Scully, Skinner, and Krycek.
CC:
Let us review
Chapter eleven!
Students:
Paragraph two,
Axiom... one???
CC:
Once one dismisses the rest of all possible shows
One finds that this is the best of all possible shows!
Students:
Once one dismisses the rest of all possible shows
One finds that this is the best of all possible shows!
CC:
Pray classify
Black oil and green goo:
Skinner:
Black oil clouds eyes.
Krycek:
Green goo eats through shoes!
CC:
There is a reason for everything under the sun
Scully:
Is there a reason why we all said "Axiom one?"
Skinner:
Objection!
What about bees?
CC:
Twas bees that led to Scully's fall
When she was there in Mulder's hall
Oh, happy bliss!
Potential kiss!
The shippers were excited!
Krycek:
Instead, love unrequited!
CC:
If bees had not been introduced
In season four first sighted
That kiss would no doubt have produced
A liaison which would reduce
This show to merely twaddle!
Now on to Aristotle!
Mankind is one,
All men are brothers.
Students:
Some hybrids come
From human mothers.
CC:
It's understood in this best of all possible shows
All's for the good in this best of all possible shows!
Mulder:
Objection!
What about corn?
CC:
Though corn may seem a yummy treat
Our corn you wouldn't want to eat
Because when grown, it has been shown
To hold the black oil virus!
Students:
A threat that doth inspire us!
CC:
I know that you all want to go
And fight the black oil virus,
But really, if you all must know,
We haven't had corn on the show
Since X-Files: Fight The Future.
Students:
A broken mytharc suture.
CC:
Mulder, it's me
Sure, fine, whatever...
Students:
Mulder, it's me
Sure, fine, whatever...
CC:
Proving that this is the best of all possible shows!
Some love, no kisses, the best of all possible shows.
Believe: The truth is out there!
I made this!
The ensemble continues repeating "Believe: The truth is out there" and "I made this!" in various challenging harmonies until they reach the climax:
Believe the truth is out there in this
Best of all possible, possible, possible shows!
Chris Carter leaps onto a table.
CC:
I know the truth is out there!
I!
Made!
THIS!!!!!!!
It's meant to be a take on "Best of All Possible Worlds" from Candide, which you can hear here. (You should watch; it's got Kristin Chenoweth.)
Chris Carter is standing at the head of a classroom. His students are Mulder, Scully, Skinner, and Krycek.
CC:
Let us review
Chapter eleven!
Students:
Paragraph two,
Axiom... one???
CC:
Once one dismisses the rest of all possible shows
One finds that this is the best of all possible shows!
Students:
Once one dismisses the rest of all possible shows
One finds that this is the best of all possible shows!
CC:
Pray classify
Black oil and green goo:
Skinner:
Black oil clouds eyes.
Krycek:
Green goo eats through shoes!
CC:
There is a reason for everything under the sun
Scully:
Is there a reason why we all said "Axiom one?"
Skinner:
Objection!
What about bees?
CC:
Twas bees that led to Scully's fall
When she was there in Mulder's hall
Oh, happy bliss!
Potential kiss!
The shippers were excited!
Krycek:
Instead, love unrequited!
CC:
If bees had not been introduced
In season four first sighted
That kiss would no doubt have produced
A liaison which would reduce
This show to merely twaddle!
Now on to Aristotle!
Mankind is one,
All men are brothers.
Students:
Some hybrids come
From human mothers.
CC:
It's understood in this best of all possible shows
All's for the good in this best of all possible shows!
Mulder:
Objection!
What about corn?
CC:
Though corn may seem a yummy treat
Our corn you wouldn't want to eat
Because when grown, it has been shown
To hold the black oil virus!
Students:
A threat that doth inspire us!
CC:
I know that you all want to go
And fight the black oil virus,
But really, if you all must know,
We haven't had corn on the show
Since X-Files: Fight The Future.
Students:
A broken mytharc suture.
CC:
Mulder, it's me
Sure, fine, whatever...
Students:
Mulder, it's me
Sure, fine, whatever...
CC:
Proving that this is the best of all possible shows!
Some love, no kisses, the best of all possible shows.
Believe: The truth is out there!
I made this!
The ensemble continues repeating "Believe: The truth is out there" and "I made this!" in various challenging harmonies until they reach the climax:
Believe the truth is out there in this
Best of all possible, possible, possible shows!
Chris Carter leaps onto a table.
CC:
I know the truth is out there!
I!
Made!
THIS!!!!!!!
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Muppets are Awesome
The Smithsonian is having a Muppets exhibit.
I went on the very first day.
(Of course, it conveniently opened on a Saturday and I was coincidentally looking for something to do that was free. I'm not that big of a dork, okay???)
The Muppets exhibit was so freaking awesome. The Muppets themselves weren't the draw, unfortunately. Sure, a Kermit behind glass is pretty fun to look at, but thanks to toy stores and the like, we've all seen a Kermit before. The one at the Smithsonian doesn't even have the qualification of being the "real" Kermit, because there's, like, 600 of them.
Nope. The real draw is the multimedia. Old, unsanitized Muppet footage from back in the days when, as Jim Henson himself put it, "We always ended our skits with someone getting eaten or someone getting blown up." (Can't source the quote -- it was from the exhibit itself so there's no hyperlink.)
It almost makes me wish I had been around in the early 1960s, to see things like Henson's series of commercials featuring two Kermit-esque Muppets who talk about the various merits of Wilkins Coffee and then, true to form, blow each other up. (Youtube footage is here.)
It was also fascinating to see how the Muppets were animated. I knew, of course, that the puppeteer was hidden behind the brick wall or trash can or ship deck or windowsill or whatever filled the lower half of the television screen, but I always assumed that the brick wall started at floor level and the puppeteer was sitting or crouching.
Not at all. When Muppets are filmed, the puppeteers stand, and the entire Muppet world (brick wall, background, etc.) is mounted up in the air. The puppeteers hold the Muppets above their heads and manipulate them while staring down at video monitors. (Hard to explain, so the Youtube is here. It's about a minute in.)
The exhibit was, in truth, two exhibits: one for little kids and one for nostalgic Gen-Xers. (In other words, the "pre-Elmo and post-Elmo" years.) The gift shop was similarly divided, with the vintage metal lunchboxes, of course, intended for the adults.
And it was interesting to learn that, even though the Muppets I grew up with have now been determined to be "no longer appropriate for children," there was an even earlier generation of Muppets that were even more violent and creepy, and an even older generation of fans.
They're showing a (free) double-feature of Dark Crystal and Labyrinth next week. Labyrinth is a favorite movie from my very young days (it has puzzles! and logic! it's a movie for dorks!), but somehow I've grown up without ever seeing Dark Crystal. So... looks like I have plans for next weekend!
I went on the very first day.
(Of course, it conveniently opened on a Saturday and I was coincidentally looking for something to do that was free. I'm not that big of a dork, okay???)
The Muppets exhibit was so freaking awesome. The Muppets themselves weren't the draw, unfortunately. Sure, a Kermit behind glass is pretty fun to look at, but thanks to toy stores and the like, we've all seen a Kermit before. The one at the Smithsonian doesn't even have the qualification of being the "real" Kermit, because there's, like, 600 of them.
Nope. The real draw is the multimedia. Old, unsanitized Muppet footage from back in the days when, as Jim Henson himself put it, "We always ended our skits with someone getting eaten or someone getting blown up." (Can't source the quote -- it was from the exhibit itself so there's no hyperlink.)
It almost makes me wish I had been around in the early 1960s, to see things like Henson's series of commercials featuring two Kermit-esque Muppets who talk about the various merits of Wilkins Coffee and then, true to form, blow each other up. (Youtube footage is here.)
It was also fascinating to see how the Muppets were animated. I knew, of course, that the puppeteer was hidden behind the brick wall or trash can or ship deck or windowsill or whatever filled the lower half of the television screen, but I always assumed that the brick wall started at floor level and the puppeteer was sitting or crouching.
Not at all. When Muppets are filmed, the puppeteers stand, and the entire Muppet world (brick wall, background, etc.) is mounted up in the air. The puppeteers hold the Muppets above their heads and manipulate them while staring down at video monitors. (Hard to explain, so the Youtube is here. It's about a minute in.)
The exhibit was, in truth, two exhibits: one for little kids and one for nostalgic Gen-Xers. (In other words, the "pre-Elmo and post-Elmo" years.) The gift shop was similarly divided, with the vintage metal lunchboxes, of course, intended for the adults.
And it was interesting to learn that, even though the Muppets I grew up with have now been determined to be "no longer appropriate for children," there was an even earlier generation of Muppets that were even more violent and creepy, and an even older generation of fans.
They're showing a (free) double-feature of Dark Crystal and Labyrinth next week. Labyrinth is a favorite movie from my very young days (it has puzzles! and logic! it's a movie for dorks!), but somehow I've grown up without ever seeing Dark Crystal. So... looks like I have plans for next weekend!
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Whether in Beruna or Birnam, When The Trees Start Moving, You Know You're Screwed
I've seen Prince Caspian ("Now With 60% More Battle Action!") twice now. Figure I might as well post a review of sorts.
Prince Caspian is the least exciting of the Narnia books, story-wise; like The Fellowship of the Ring, way too much of the book involves characters walking through a forest. Walden Media solved that problem for us by including about two hours of battle footage that had no relevance to the original text, e.g. Operation Storm Miraz's Castle. They also threw in a romance between Susan and Caspian, which, if we're going anywhere near canon, could have been played as a precursor to "Susan grows up to be silly and boycrazy," but they played it as an OTP.
Probably the worst thing about the movie -- besides the gratuitous battle sequences -- was the representation of the Telmarines. Darker-skinned and funny accents! (I use the term "funny" literally; it seems like some voice coach invented an accent for the characters by taking a myriad of elongated vowel sounds and mushing them all together.) This doesn't bode well for the future films; Lewis' Calmorenes are drawn almost as racially insulting as Dahl's Oompa-Loompas, and it would be too easy for Walden to go Calmorene = Muslim = Evil.
The thing about the Telmarines is that by this point in Narnian chronology they aren't so much a "race" of mysterious, evil, accent-wielding people as they are a nationality. After 1500 years of wandering and conquering and marrying the people of Narnia and the Lone Islands, there isn't so much a "good guys = British accents, bad guys = funny accents" thing going on. Miraz' wife is named Prunaprisma. The cultures have merged together.
Oh, and then at the end of the book/movie Aslan sends the Telmarines back to twentieth-century Earth. I think I didn't really understand the implications of that when I was a kid. He opens a door and takes all of the Telmarines who don't want to be ruled by Caspian and pushes them through into 1945 Polynesia. He promises that they will have a good life there, but I can't imagine how.
One of the things I really liked about the movie was its acknowledgment of the fact that the Pevensie children grew up in Narnia and became adults, and then were shunted back to childhood when they fell back through the wardrobe. (They're the only people in history who got to go through puberty twice.) Lewis never really dealt with that, and I always wanted to know more about what it felt like for the kids. To go from thirty years old to eight years old in a second, and to carry all of that knowledge (of what it felt like, physically and mentally, to be adult) with you.
(Incidentally, when I was young and reading The Last Battle, whenever I felt sad that the Pevensie children died while they were still teenagers, I consoled myself with the knowledge that they had at least gotten to live for about 50 years, if you counted their adulthoods in Narnia.)
After the movie, my sister and I decided that Peter and Caspian had their battle strategy all wrong. Susan has a magic bow and a quiver of unlimited arrows that will always hit their target. Lucy has a cordial that can heal any wound. Their strategy should have been "Susan shoots her magical arrows at the bad guys; Lucy heals Susan (and herself) any time they are wounded. Everyone else goes to Aslan's How and hides." ^__^
Prince Caspian is the least exciting of the Narnia books, story-wise; like The Fellowship of the Ring, way too much of the book involves characters walking through a forest. Walden Media solved that problem for us by including about two hours of battle footage that had no relevance to the original text, e.g. Operation Storm Miraz's Castle. They also threw in a romance between Susan and Caspian, which, if we're going anywhere near canon, could have been played as a precursor to "Susan grows up to be silly and boycrazy," but they played it as an OTP.
Probably the worst thing about the movie -- besides the gratuitous battle sequences -- was the representation of the Telmarines. Darker-skinned and funny accents! (I use the term "funny" literally; it seems like some voice coach invented an accent for the characters by taking a myriad of elongated vowel sounds and mushing them all together.) This doesn't bode well for the future films; Lewis' Calmorenes are drawn almost as racially insulting as Dahl's Oompa-Loompas, and it would be too easy for Walden to go Calmorene = Muslim = Evil.
The thing about the Telmarines is that by this point in Narnian chronology they aren't so much a "race" of mysterious, evil, accent-wielding people as they are a nationality. After 1500 years of wandering and conquering and marrying the people of Narnia and the Lone Islands, there isn't so much a "good guys = British accents, bad guys = funny accents" thing going on. Miraz' wife is named Prunaprisma. The cultures have merged together.
Oh, and then at the end of the book/movie Aslan sends the Telmarines back to twentieth-century Earth. I think I didn't really understand the implications of that when I was a kid. He opens a door and takes all of the Telmarines who don't want to be ruled by Caspian and pushes them through into 1945 Polynesia. He promises that they will have a good life there, but I can't imagine how.
One of the things I really liked about the movie was its acknowledgment of the fact that the Pevensie children grew up in Narnia and became adults, and then were shunted back to childhood when they fell back through the wardrobe. (They're the only people in history who got to go through puberty twice.) Lewis never really dealt with that, and I always wanted to know more about what it felt like for the kids. To go from thirty years old to eight years old in a second, and to carry all of that knowledge (of what it felt like, physically and mentally, to be adult) with you.
(Incidentally, when I was young and reading The Last Battle, whenever I felt sad that the Pevensie children died while they were still teenagers, I consoled myself with the knowledge that they had at least gotten to live for about 50 years, if you counted their adulthoods in Narnia.)
After the movie, my sister and I decided that Peter and Caspian had their battle strategy all wrong. Susan has a magic bow and a quiver of unlimited arrows that will always hit their target. Lucy has a cordial that can heal any wound. Their strategy should have been "Susan shoots her magical arrows at the bad guys; Lucy heals Susan (and herself) any time they are wounded. Everyone else goes to Aslan's How and hides." ^__^
Saturday, May 10, 2008
After Seeing the Golden Compass Movie...
Two responses.
1. That movie wasn't... um... very good.
2. OMG OMG OMG THEY NEED TO MAKE A FINAL FANTASY VI MOVIE USING THAT DESIGN AND CGI AND THEY NEED TO MAKE IT RIGHT, NONE OF THAT "ADVENT CHILDREN" GARBAGE
Wasn't that the most beautiful airship you've ever seen?
(Previous Philip Pullman posts: Golden Compass, Subtle Knife, Amber Spyglass, and Lyra's Oxford.)
1. That movie wasn't... um... very good.
2. OMG OMG OMG THEY NEED TO MAKE A FINAL FANTASY VI MOVIE USING THAT DESIGN AND CGI AND THEY NEED TO MAKE IT RIGHT, NONE OF THAT "ADVENT CHILDREN" GARBAGE
Wasn't that the most beautiful airship you've ever seen?
(Previous Philip Pullman posts: Golden Compass, Subtle Knife, Amber Spyglass, and Lyra's Oxford.)
Monday, April 28, 2008
Harold's Closet
I saw H&K2: Gitmo this weekend.
Between the scatalogical humor, the shirtless Penn and Cho, the luscious shot of the two of them in their 1970s finest, the social commentary, the cultural commentary, the racial commentary, the political commentary, and the "marijuana is not teh evil, if used appropriately it's just fine" commentary, one image will remain forever etched into my memory.
Harold's closet.
(Well, Kumar's closet too, since they were structurally identical, but Harold's was the tidy one.)
I never knew there could be such a closet. Walk-in closets I've seen before, but never one with separate little cubbies for each shoe.
I think I may have to devote the rest of my life to amassing enough money to live in an apartment with a closet like that. Drawers and places to hang clothing! Shelves and shoe cubbies!
*sigh*
When Kumar marries his (redheaded, white) girlfriend, Harold will clearly need a new roommate. I am volunteering myself. I will be much tidier, and in H&K3 I can act as a foil for Maria. I can play Lucca to her Marle, which would mean that, by the end of the movie, I would have a hot robot boyfriend. Everybody wins!
Between the scatalogical humor, the shirtless Penn and Cho, the luscious shot of the two of them in their 1970s finest, the social commentary, the cultural commentary, the racial commentary, the political commentary, and the "marijuana is not teh evil, if used appropriately it's just fine" commentary, one image will remain forever etched into my memory.
Harold's closet.
(Well, Kumar's closet too, since they were structurally identical, but Harold's was the tidy one.)
I never knew there could be such a closet. Walk-in closets I've seen before, but never one with separate little cubbies for each shoe.
I think I may have to devote the rest of my life to amassing enough money to live in an apartment with a closet like that. Drawers and places to hang clothing! Shelves and shoe cubbies!
*sigh*
When Kumar marries his (redheaded, white) girlfriend, Harold will clearly need a new roommate. I am volunteering myself. I will be much tidier, and in H&K3 I can act as a foil for Maria. I can play Lucca to her Marle, which would mean that, by the end of the movie, I would have a hot robot boyfriend. Everybody wins!
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